But if I have the right to defend myself, or think about why they could see me selfish, then I have two reasons:
1- I'm someone who seeks perfection, a perfectionist. So, I want to do everything right, I want everything, I don't like missing anything, I don't want to compromise, I can't live with regrets.
2- They only call me selfish when I treat them somehow less than what they are used to from me -- it's because I'm (as I think I am) completely the opposite of selfish, I live for others, not a bit for myself, and that's the thing that's actually totally wrong. When I try to do something for myself, and not them this time, they get to call me selfish!
P.S: Now please don't judge them and say they are bad people who don't know me at all, it's because you too don't know me this much, and also you haven't heard their defence yet!
There always has to be something, a defect, that ruins my Inner Peace, my Illusion of Perfection.