Wednesday, April 20

Something to say

This week was the weirdest week ever! It still hasn't ended yet, but everything was just going in the wrong direction. Until today and everything is just starting to get back on track. I had many thoughts and here I'll lay them.
  •  It was all messed up. There was a delay, there was a life to worry about, there was a fear un-handled. But everything went gently greatly. Yes it didn't satisfy me a bit, I didn't satisfy me! But to them, who matter the most, they had the fun of their lives! Thank God!
  •  I had the longest day ever; a day that was more than 24 hours. I was too tired to continue, too emotionally exhausted to carry on! But I did, and amazingly I did a lot of things that I needed to do!
  •  I couldn't believe a gift could bring tears. But it wasn't the gift, it was what it meant.
  •  I got shocked by how you thought of me. It was like you really never knew me. And it hurts when suddenly you figure out that those who you spend most of your time with know nothing about how to appreciate you!
  •  Then came the time I needed my shell to sleep and stay sleeping. Nothing was what I needed to do mostly and nothing I did. Felt nice though not reliving!
  •  Still the nothingness conquers me, but nothing is ever nothing.
  •  And then came the feeling and the confession that I can't help dealing with us specially when we're all stressed up.
  •  Did I mention that you were away and never there never trying to break the barriers being built? You're still away and the barriers keep growing. Did I mention that I do not wish to be the one who breaks them? and I won't!
  •  Things gone messy but found their way at the end after a heartache. I know I might be mistaken and done lots of mistakes. Yes I was, because I was in a need to not to act wisely and so I did! What's wrong with that? I needed to go mad!
  •  And Today was the day of clearing the fog, and tidying the mess. Though the day started with a huge humiliation, but it ended with a compassion.
  •  I let my tears find their way today, I couldn't keep holding them more; they help when they flow.
  •  I know what I came to hear but I couldn't think of a better reaction than what really happened.
  •  Things are worse, but we are much more stronger and better. We're together and no one has given up.
  •  You made me happy to know you moved step forward in this that was causing us all the pain.
  •  And also today, you were the one who corrects me without embarrassing me, who blames me without making me feel bad about myself, who advices me rather than shouts at me and who supports me the most when I needed it the most just from you.
  •  Forgiveness is something that I felt today. I always thought it was an impossible thing to achieve, but you always make me see that it's such an easy thing to do. You're kindness is the kindness I'm searching for; the kindness that comes strictly and unnoticed. 
  •  Did I mention also that you didn't care at all to call? And you know what, I think I should stop this big fat lie that I'm living myself in.
  •  About lying I could write a whole article!
  •  In the end! It's much more harder than before. But I promised myself to never give up! And today gave me the reason of why I should never give up! 
  •  I'll carry on strongly and I'll make it till the end to be the winner that never quits!
  •  Just Thank You!! =)

**Note: Every "you" is different, so don't bother yourself matching the "you"s. It actually might be you.

1 comment:

Salma Attia said...

Salma....i can find no words :D:D

you gather all the emotions, put it aside, sequence or not that's not the point, but you do describe them the best!!

we ba3den ba2a ma3aki :D:D

till when, when i read your notes; reactions and emotions towardsa things/persons i can have a reflection on mine too!!

:D:D ana ba2oul ba3d keda we feel it together, you write it on your own :D:D we neb2a waffarna wa2t ya3ny badal ma kol wa7ed yekeb lewa7do :P:P

That's so relieving indeed :) Keep the Freedom Up ;)